Useless Police

At some point back I wrote a post complaining about how I watched an astoundingly useless attempt by police not wearing body armour to arrest an amphetamine criminal in a car at traffic lights. Having approached with no weapon drawn, while halfway into the car the officer attempting the arrest was shot and later died, and the criminal fled.

My suggestion was that when police are trying to arrest someone selling a drug which some 2,000-3,000 people were extra-judicially executed for involvement with 5 years back and which at the best of times carries heavy jail time, and that drug is one which reportedly makes people go nuts and one can assume the criminal is using his merchandise, and one is in a country where firearms are widely available... they should TAKE CAUTION.

The nice explanation given on the news after this incident where army officers wearing body armour approached a vehicle with weapons drawn obviously hasn't filtered down. Today on the 19:40 news the  police had found a shop that was apparently being used for amphetamine distribution with a hostile criminal inside (though I didn't catch all of the info on that). With the crowd standing a safe 2 metres back, an armed policeman not wearing body armour approached the metal elevator-style grill of the shop and started trying to kick it open (Thai people are usually stronger than metal so I don't know why it didn't work in this case, which may just be an exceptional mishap). Doing this exposed himself the criminal who promptly shot him.

People like to have a good moan about how corrupt and useless the Thai police are, but look at the system they work in. Low wages, poor equipment budgets, (lethally) poor training, silly hats, and most importantly a deeply entrenched culture of financial corruption and lack of accountability and transparency that goes to the very top. This environment is undoubtedly going to attract people who are not aiming to be bastions of justice, and it's going to let them get away with it. This is at the expense of the average person and society and the nation as a whole.

I've always generally been a pro-police person (being anti-police in the UK seems an untenable position to me) but apart from discovering that large amounts of some sort of garlic mixed with chicken makes me vomit and that I actually like being sober, living in Thailand has made me appreciate the British police much more. They're not perfect and there is massive room for improvement, but they're a damn sight better than what you get elsewhere!

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Reader Competition!

If you can guess what sport I was watching on ESPN when I heard the commentator say ""wow, the judges are gonna stoke him out with that one" I'll award you with a full interview on any subject of your choice and publish it here.

Remember, my blog receives over 500,000 hits per month, this is a great chance for you to get yourself out there!

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Stupid Khao San Road

It rained tonight, which naturally caused Khao San Road and many other places to flood, because of inadequate drainage systems / drainage systems clogged up by the plastic waste that results from the lack of proper public trash cans. I've always cursed forgetting my camera when the road floods, but I happened to get my life in order tonight.

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My, what big...

Mega Gecko. The wood it it half resting on is 5 inches wide, so it's close to 30cm long. This thing never sleeps. It makes a lot of noise. First it produces a croaking sound (twice), then 5-7 "IIIH-OHH" noises. This caused me a lot of bother when I first moved into the house because I would constantly dream someone was talking to me, only to wake up and find it was the damn Mega Gecko. This thing can follow you anywhere. I once stuck a stick in Mega Gecko's face and instead of fleeing, he bit it.

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Your the Best English Teacher Every!

Just seen an example of some really high-quality english teaching. Without any assessment of the student's ability to speak english, he hands out workbooks on suffixes, writes some instructions (in English, and to be honest I couldn't read or understand them) and sends the kids off.

I know this is blue-sky thinking, but it would be nice if they could teach the children to speak english and pronounce "th" before explaining what the "en" in "whiten" means.

Sigh.

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Dream This!

Everybody dreams. It's a demonstrable fact. Yet, everyone knows someone who claims that they do not dream. You might even be the person who tells people you never dream.

The reason people think they don't dream is that their dream recall is far worse than average and they just don't remember what they dreamt about.

I've been keeping a dream journal, which is just a pad and pen by my bed, and when I wake up during the night and in the morning I make a big effort to remember and write down what I dreamt about. This helps improve recollection of dreams, which is useful if you want to try and have lucid dreams.

Anyway, I do wake up to some fairly amusing scrawlings of the message I took from the dream or a snippet of content on the paper. Some of my favourites include:

"Pig sleep better with a dry mouth"

"Bevel your house.
Bevel your house.
Bevel your house."

"Eminem newspaper misquote leads to dry accusations"

"Loads of dwarfs dancing outside parliament. The public must also dance foolishly to prevent them asking awkward questions of politicians."

If you can't remember your dreams and would like to get in on the action, all you need is a pen and paper and some willpower.

By the way, I once met a girl who openly called me a liar when I said I had a friend called Dave who could lick his own elbow. She said it was impossible and I was lying in front of the group. She was so confident that I was wrong that to rub it in, in front of everyone she tried to lick her own elbow. And she succeeded.

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Reflex Mega Matrix Ultra Anabolic Catabolic Hyperbolic Diastolic Protein Powder

Protein powder is very expensive in Thailand and it's also unnecessary given that you can eat meat and eggs for very little cash. Nonethless, I like eating powder products, and a little while ago I came across this powdered milk stuff for children over 3 years old. It's advertised all the time on TV so for £6 for 1.1kg I thought I might as well. It's actually pretty nice, has lots of vitamins, various omega fatty acids and is 20% protein, so not bad. I get funny looks when I eat it though. It would taste good mixed with real whey.

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Stop Cheating on Me...

Most people returning from a 3 week trip to Thailand will be wearing half-inch thick cataract-style rose-tinted glasses, and most will tell you about how honest the Thai people are. This post isn't about the way Thai people openly point out aspects of your physique to you (What? I have a big nose? Are you SURE?! In 22 years I've NEVER touched my face or seen a reflective surface. But - oh my god! - there it is!) or the seemingly instinctive urge to overcharge foreigners many Thai people have. Instead, it points out that: People who think Thailand is the land of honesty have never encountered... Schoolchildren.

In Thailand, appearances are very important. Style over substance isn't a bad thing. Better to turn up to work and do nothing at all than not show up. Better to dress nicely and perform poorly than not shaving and do well - Just look at what websites for prospective english teachers is Thailand outline as tips to get a job
1) Speak english
2) Wear a shirt and tie and shave in the photo you supply in your application
3) Be white.

Anyway, the style over substance notion applies in schools - it's preferable for students to complete homework and get a top score than for them to understand it. This basically means answer copying from the few actual good students is incredibly rife. I see it myself. Even in higher education, the extent of plagiarism riles western teachers.* It's just acceptable.

Today, I was asked to help with some English homework. By "help" I mean "complete." The student whose book was presented to me was not in sight and I asked what the point in me doing this was - how was anyone going to learn anything - and refused to do it. This got a bad reception and I was the bad guy!

If the emphasis is simply on completing homework by any means, actual education goes out the window, endorsing dishonesty and laziness at the same time.

10 years in that sort of educational environment MUST carry over into adulthood. Wouldn't you agree?

To any argument that says this is just a cultural difference and no better or worse than western education, I say this: In Thailand, you need a university degree to work in a 7/11. That's the quality of education that results from this pedagogical environment.

*The above is less applicable to the top 3 in Bangkok and possibly the university in Chiang Mai.

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Ebook Readers (for Law Students especially)

This isn't a review of an Ebook or eBook or whatever device because I haven't bought one, yet.

I was quite sceptical about the idea of a little gadget that wanted to replace paper books but having looked into it a bit, they do actually seem like a good idea. The biggest thing to point out is that ebook readers don't use a screen like a laptop, pc or iPod. They use electronic paper technology called E-Ink, which involves capsules containing black or white pigment being excited by electrical current. The result closely mimics real paper, so it can be read in full sunlight, just like a real book. Though many ebook readers boast other features like being able to download books off the web, play audiobooks or have newspapers, journals or blogs delivered straight to them, for me the main reason to buy one is because of the paper-like display.

I am, or was, a law student (I will be again in September) and a big part of that is reading cases, which in this modern age are all accessed online. The problem I had was that reading a very long judgement on a laptop screen was quite uncomfortable. My eyes got tired and though I wouldn't necessarily get a headache, it was general tiring and unenjoyable to be hunched over at my desk, squinting at text on an LCD screen for extended periods of time. When faced with reading several judgements, articles etc... I admit that I would end up skimming. The fact was that you didn't really need to read the whole of every case. For the most part you could just learn "Principle X is supported by Case Y" and maybe throw in a quote from a judge, which was easily gleaned from textbook or internet case summaries. This is quite sad in a way because by reading every case I think I would have had a better understanding of the law in general, would have read many more journal articles and would likely be a bit smarter than I am now.

You might say that I could have just printed the cases off. The problem is that if the average judgement is 20-40 pages long and every day you are shown 5-10 new cases, if you were going to print them all off you'd end up with 20,000+ A4 sheets in a single year. First you have to pay for them, second you have to find somewhere to keep them.

Because I'm starting the Bar Vocational Course or whatever they've decided to rename it in September, there'll be a lot more case reading to do and I'm confident that if I can download a load of judgements, articles and statutes to an electronic piece of paper as thick as a pencil, it will almost be like the old days where law students read cases in books, except I'll be able to do it anywhere, especially as the battery life of the readers is 1-2 weeks.

The cost of decent ebook readers is coming down to around £150 and whilst that seemed like quite a lot to me, I think it's actually worthwhile, if you're going to be doing a lot of reading. I haven't even mentioned reading real books.

Here's an example of what this E-ink looks like. Pretty much just like paper, right? If anyone has an ebook reader, please let me know what you think of it.

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You only have 1 hour to live...

You wake up in a dirty, windowless bathroom, chained to a rusting metal pipe on the wall. This is like Saw. In the centre of the room is a computer with a message on the screen:

You have been poisoned. Unless you take the antidote within 1 hour you will die. I will dispense the antidote if you use the computer to create a remix of a song that would enjoy great success in Thailand.

The evil genius didn't count on you reading this though. To create a successful Thai remix, select a song. Then use "the beat." There is only one beat used for a thai remix. I kid you not, the same beat is used for every single remix. It features a "1-2" beat and an occasional drum flurry. Speed up the original song and finally lay a man saying "huhhuhhuhhuh" over the top of most of the song.

You've just completed a thai remix as good as any you will hear on a commercial radio station and it only took you 6 minutes. Enjoy your antidote and future success as a Thai DJ.

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